THEY’RE ONLY HAPPY WHEN IT RAINS: INTRODUCING THE ‘S’ SERIES WHEELBARRAH
Posted in: Aspley Red, LTLF - Nottingham Forest
An American friend of mine supports the Boston Red Sox, a team who toiled for years in the backwaters of Major League Baseball. If life as a Sox fan was bleak – a masochistic slog, laced with misfortune and trauma and a stubborn whiff of the surreal – then it was particularly bleak in [...]
You-Tar Saints? The League of Extradordinary Inactivity
Posted in: Aspley Red, Two Footed Tackle
“They do not consist of diplomats, or even professors of political law, or even individuals capable of forming a rational opinion; they consist of plain mortals, wavering and inclined to doubt and uncertainty.” – Mein Kampf
You know, if it wasn’t for the Football League’s ceaseless commitment to self-parody, they might actually find the time to [...]
That Damned United: A Requiem
Posted in: Aspley Red, Two Footed Tackle
“Alan Shearer is not only a possible choice… but a necessary one.” Aspley_Red, ‘The Damned Uniteds’, March 29th, 2009
And so, on March 31st, in the two thousandth and ninth year of Wor Lord, there came news of a man begrudgingly shaking hands with his destiny. And whilst I may have strayed into somewhat narcissistic [...]
Damned Uniteds
Posted in: Aspley Red, Two Footed Tackle
In this glorious game of ours, one of the most popular – nay, unanswerable – pieces of brinksmanship is that ‘x’ is, truly, ‘a football town’. More often than not, that’s shorthand for “because it’s miles from anywhere and there’s nothing else to do”, but still it sustains itself as the consoling, bullet-proof myth [...]
…And Justice for ALL?
Posted in: Aspley Red, Two Footed Tackle
They may have lost some battles along the way, but by God, haven’t they just won the war? The East End has a storied history of villainy and turpitude, and as the dust settles on the Carlos Tevez fiasco, Bjorgolfur Gudmundsson must be writing hush cheques with the zeal of a young Ronnie Kray. [...]
I’m talking to you, Tim Lovejoy!
Posted in: Aspley Red, Two Footed Tackle
Let’s face it, football is a game peopled by idiots. And that’s probably for the best, because it wouldn’t have survived otherwise. It’s a game swollen with burps of spirit and farts of the soul, everything hinging on rude instinct, because it’s hard to cultivate things like love and hate and outrage and [...]
Be Good, Colin Yates!
Posted in: Aspley Red, Magazines, Two Footed Tackle
So where is he? That’s what everyone’s been asking this week. The LMA have only gone and commissioned a print recognizing the fifty greatest contributors to English football management throughout the last century, and the artist – Colin Yates – has only gone and forgotten Him. A man of substance and character, [...]
The League Cup Final!
Posted in: Aspley Red, Two Footed Tackle
MANCHESTER UNITED v TOTTENHAM HOTSPUR v EASTENDERS v A LIFE IN THE COUNTRY
Click to see our latest two footed tackle… ouch!
The League Cup is inglorious business these days, eking out a grubby existence in the shallows of satellite TV, dallying about on the same rung as Formula 3 pay-per-views and hotel porn. Still, a [...]
© All content copyright BallsMania 2009 unless otherwise stated.
